Dear Ja,
Tonight the kids and I were listening to Handel's Messiah. I think they have that scripture memorized now. I could hear Liza singing it in the bathroom while brushing her teeth. Ben was so tired tonight. He called me stupid and wouldn't apologize. Liza told me I was too lenient on him. So, I stopped what I was doing and told him that was wrong and 'are you sorry?' He screamed, no he wasn't so I washed his mouth with soap until he was. I told him he could come out of the bathroom when he was sorry. He tried coming out again and again so I finally held onto the bathroom door knob to keep it closed. All 3 kids were sitting like an audience watching me, so I did what anyone would do. I started. . .singing. "Train up a child in the way he should go and when he is old he will not depart from it." The kids smiled and I noticed they recognized the song and started humming along. Finally, he was ready to come out and apologize. He had not one tear either. Just a stubborn, eyebrows down look that was at war during our battle of the wits. He perked up at dinner time. Of course he said he didn't want any. I told him he still had to sit at the table during dinner anyway. I told him 4 bites but then happily he told me 10. He followed through counting on his fingers with each bite up to 10. Maybe he was just hungry? I wonder if it has anything to do with you being gone? He normally doesn't do anything like that.
I don't know why Emma asked you on the phone about deployment. I haven't been talking about it at all with anyone so she couldn't have overheard anything. Maybe just having you gone now reminded her of the possibility. She's probably going to be the one to take it (consciously) the hardest. Hope you're enjoying your visit with Tyler in Texas.
Luv, me
BLESSED!!
This blog is written for my beloved husband who is his family's hero. Jason who serves his country through the army, with dedication and loyalty has a family who supports him. This is for him to read while he is stationed in different parts of the world.
Tuesday, November 30, 2010
Saturday, November 27, 2010
Proverbs 17:22 "A merry heart doeth good [like] a medicine: but a broken spirit drieth the bones."
Dear Ja,
As I walked around the house tonight cleaning (while you and the kids watched 'Flicka') the mess around me made my heart merry. Seeing your no shame bathing suit (since you wear it in public when you know it's too short) hanging on the bathtub nozzle meant you went swimming with the kids today. Seeing your hair mess all over the bathroom floor meant you cut your own hair saving us money/time/effort. Seeing your wet towel on the floor meant you are still living with us. It made my spirit light. The mere fact that a movie is just barley starting at 8:45pm must mean you are still living at home. That would only be carried out by you my fun-loving darling. I guess the kids are going to go into TV withdraws when you go.
Luv, me
PS it made my heart really merry when I reluctantly and discouragingly mentioned a swingset helping me while you are gone and you answered, "don't underestimate me. I can see to it that your needs are met when I am gone. If it's for you and not the kids, that's a different story." I liked that. Even if I don't get one, it's the response that fulfilled me the most.
Luv, me
As I walked around the house tonight cleaning (while you and the kids watched 'Flicka') the mess around me made my heart merry. Seeing your no shame bathing suit (since you wear it in public when you know it's too short) hanging on the bathtub nozzle meant you went swimming with the kids today. Seeing your hair mess all over the bathroom floor meant you cut your own hair saving us money/time/effort. Seeing your wet towel on the floor meant you are still living with us. It made my spirit light. The mere fact that a movie is just barley starting at 8:45pm must mean you are still living at home. That would only be carried out by you my fun-loving darling. I guess the kids are going to go into TV withdraws when you go.
Luv, me
PS it made my heart really merry when I reluctantly and discouragingly mentioned a swingset helping me while you are gone and you answered, "don't underestimate me. I can see to it that your needs are met when I am gone. If it's for you and not the kids, that's a different story." I liked that. Even if I don't get one, it's the response that fulfilled me the most.
Luv, me
1 Thessalonians 5:18 18 "In every thing give thanks"
Dear Ja,
Giving thanks in everything is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning me. It says so in Thessalonians. So I wanted to thank you sincerely for giving me the opportunity to learn and grow in myself while you are absent. I have potentials that I don't know exisist in myself that will give me independent confindence, something that I may be lacking and may not even know it. I've been spoiled my whole life through. I went straight from daddy providing for me, then months later straight out of high school married you. I've always been taken care of. Perhaps it's time for me to learn some of the things most people learn in that season of life in college or on a mission, on their own. I thank you for this opportunity. God is allowing me to gain back that which was lost in my life.
Luv, me
P.S. I'm having difficulty thanking you for allowing me to take out the garbage every night though. Blah.
Giving thanks in everything is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning me. It says so in Thessalonians. So I wanted to thank you sincerely for giving me the opportunity to learn and grow in myself while you are absent. I have potentials that I don't know exisist in myself that will give me independent confindence, something that I may be lacking and may not even know it. I've been spoiled my whole life through. I went straight from daddy providing for me, then months later straight out of high school married you. I've always been taken care of. Perhaps it's time for me to learn some of the things most people learn in that season of life in college or on a mission, on their own. I thank you for this opportunity. God is allowing me to gain back that which was lost in my life.
Luv, me
P.S. I'm having difficulty thanking you for allowing me to take out the garbage every night though. Blah.
Thursday, November 25, 2010
Thanks for Thanks- Day Psalms 107:1 "O give thanks unto the LORD, for [he is] good: for his mercy [endureth] for ever."
Dear Ja,
Just wanted to thank you for a wonderful thanksgiving day with you. I liked how I just kept cooking away while you kept up with the dishes to make it enjoyable for me. I will miss that time with you next year. It made me giggle when I was trying to give away the rest of my artichoke dip to the McArthurs and you responded with, "Oh are you sure, you may just want it when you are wanting to snuggle up and watch a movie with me." In otherwords, thanks for the compliment and yes I will watch a movie with you tonight with or without the dip.
Luv, Shan
P.S. thanks for making me feel good about my little 12lb turkey (Fred) compared to the 25lb one we ate tonight. Our turkey had special meaning because it was the one Liza won in her archery contest, huh?
Just wanted to thank you for a wonderful thanksgiving day with you. I liked how I just kept cooking away while you kept up with the dishes to make it enjoyable for me. I will miss that time with you next year. It made me giggle when I was trying to give away the rest of my artichoke dip to the McArthurs and you responded with, "Oh are you sure, you may just want it when you are wanting to snuggle up and watch a movie with me." In otherwords, thanks for the compliment and yes I will watch a movie with you tonight with or without the dip.
Luv, Shan
P.S. thanks for making me feel good about my little 12lb turkey (Fred) compared to the 25lb one we ate tonight. Our turkey had special meaning because it was the one Liza won in her archery contest, huh?
Alma 37:37 "when thou liest down at night lie down unto the Lord, that he may watch over you in your sleep; and when thou risest in the cmorning let thy heart be full of thanks unto God;"
Dear Ja,
I woke up at 4am this Thanksgiving morning and just lied there with much to be thankful for. I just enjoyed having you lay next to me listening to you breath. My heart went out to you as I thought about you out there having no one to be connected with. Who's going to be your touch? Who will you hug or talk with? I think I was able to think outside of myself for a minute in the quiet darkness and I just inhaled it all in.
Luv, Shan
I woke up at 4am this Thanksgiving morning and just lied there with much to be thankful for. I just enjoyed having you lay next to me listening to you breath. My heart went out to you as I thought about you out there having no one to be connected with. Who's going to be your touch? Who will you hug or talk with? I think I was able to think outside of myself for a minute in the quiet darkness and I just inhaled it all in.
Luv, Shan
Wednesday, November 24, 2010
Psalms 46:10 "Be still and know that I am God."
Dear Ja,
As I continue to write my way through my feelings I hope that it not only feeds my soul or keeps family updated but I hope it can strengthen others going through the same situation.
I'm not looking for a '10 easy steps for depolyment' or a 'how to cultivate long distance relationships' or even navigating through military culture. I will face head on the challenges I will face personally, as well as monitoring how I respond to daily struggles that threaten to drag or weigh me down. God has a purpose for me just as strong as yours. I have been called too. God is in control. He has the power to manipulate the system to send you anywhere. He is in complete control, therefore, He approves our mission. . .Is there any difference, then, if He Himself called us to this mission?
Luv, me
As I continue to write my way through my feelings I hope that it not only feeds my soul or keeps family updated but I hope it can strengthen others going through the same situation.
I'm not looking for a '10 easy steps for depolyment' or a 'how to cultivate long distance relationships' or even navigating through military culture. I will face head on the challenges I will face personally, as well as monitoring how I respond to daily struggles that threaten to drag or weigh me down. God has a purpose for me just as strong as yours. I have been called too. God is in control. He has the power to manipulate the system to send you anywhere. He is in complete control, therefore, He approves our mission. . .Is there any difference, then, if He Himself called us to this mission?
Luv, me
2 Corinthians 10:3-5 "we do not war according to flesh"
Dear Ja,
I just got off the phone with you and realized I had to do the mourning process all over again. Switching the news from Iraq to Afganistan made me have the same reaction a few weeks ago when I first recieved the news: A saddness I have never felt before. I felt I had reached acceptance stage so I was able to write on the blog about it. I realize if I only write on the blog when I am in 'unwaivering, firm, like a brick' state, I will have only a few posts. I'm realizing that this is just the beginning and there is no end to the roller coaster journey of emotions this military life is going to offer me. The best way to cope, therefore, is to express along the way and live each day for what it has to offer in it's fullest. I think a letter to you on a consistent basis will allow me to feel closer to you while we are apart. Sometimes that 'apart' feeling can still exist while living under the same roof. We will call this stage the pre-deployment stage. I hope when we are old in our rockers we will, as a result, be closer than we ever could have been otherwise. If we do, they whole journey of sacrifice, my love, will be worth it.
Luv, me
I just got off the phone with you and realized I had to do the mourning process all over again. Switching the news from Iraq to Afganistan made me have the same reaction a few weeks ago when I first recieved the news: A saddness I have never felt before. I felt I had reached acceptance stage so I was able to write on the blog about it. I realize if I only write on the blog when I am in 'unwaivering, firm, like a brick' state, I will have only a few posts. I'm realizing that this is just the beginning and there is no end to the roller coaster journey of emotions this military life is going to offer me. The best way to cope, therefore, is to express along the way and live each day for what it has to offer in it's fullest. I think a letter to you on a consistent basis will allow me to feel closer to you while we are apart. Sometimes that 'apart' feeling can still exist while living under the same roof. We will call this stage the pre-deployment stage. I hope when we are old in our rockers we will, as a result, be closer than we ever could have been otherwise. If we do, they whole journey of sacrifice, my love, will be worth it.
Luv, me
Sunday, November 21, 2010
www.milblogging.com
Look what I found! A site that contains hundreds of military wives and their blogs. Whoa. . .In President Hinckley's words, "This is the greatest age the world has known!"
1 Peter 1:7 "These (trials) have come to prove the genuineness of your faith"
We Are all tested in God's Plan for Us.
to finish the verse: "of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire—may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed"
I guess the question is do we follow that plan or resist it? Do we melt because of the flames or become refined through it? I do believe if we resist our destiny or potential that God has in store for us, things in our life will feel unbalanced. Something will seem amiss or peace will be shaken. Otherwise, how can some people have all the worldly possesions society deems as providing happiness but have results of unhappiness? Yet others can be dealt the cards of tragedy or heartbreak and they seem to be at peace and still find joy in the smallest things around them. I don't believe in the lie, "you can be whatever you want to be" I do believe "you can become whatever you want to work at."
We all have cross roads in our lives that make us look back. Why do we look back? i.e. contemplate our lives and re-evaluate. Maybe for us to see our travels. How far we've come and which way now? Probably because we have a choice of which way to go next. More importantly, how we will respond to the next stone (or boulder) thrown in our path.
I realize only by first trusting God, I can do the rest. . . through Him. (over and over and over again). Welcome to a cross road in my life. Come and enjoy the jouney of bliss, falls, detours, valleys and mountains as I turn my commitment of marriage and share it with the country I'm commited to. God bless you America. It is God who created you. Take good care of my best friend and his family as we serve you.
"Long may our land be bright,
With freedom's holy light,
Protect us by Thy might,
Great God, our King!"
'God is America's King'. I am honored to be a servant of His cabinet.
'God is the giver of freedom'. Perseving it is our job.
'God bless America!' Oh King, please protect us all while we serve your country for your glory!
to finish the verse: "of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire—may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed"
I guess the question is do we follow that plan or resist it? Do we melt because of the flames or become refined through it? I do believe if we resist our destiny or potential that God has in store for us, things in our life will feel unbalanced. Something will seem amiss or peace will be shaken. Otherwise, how can some people have all the worldly possesions society deems as providing happiness but have results of unhappiness? Yet others can be dealt the cards of tragedy or heartbreak and they seem to be at peace and still find joy in the smallest things around them. I don't believe in the lie, "you can be whatever you want to be" I do believe "you can become whatever you want to work at."
We all have cross roads in our lives that make us look back. Why do we look back? i.e. contemplate our lives and re-evaluate. Maybe for us to see our travels. How far we've come and which way now? Probably because we have a choice of which way to go next. More importantly, how we will respond to the next stone (or boulder) thrown in our path.
I realize only by first trusting God, I can do the rest. . . through Him. (over and over and over again). Welcome to a cross road in my life. Come and enjoy the jouney of bliss, falls, detours, valleys and mountains as I turn my commitment of marriage and share it with the country I'm commited to. God bless you America. It is God who created you. Take good care of my best friend and his family as we serve you.
"Long may our land be bright,
With freedom's holy light,
Protect us by Thy might,
Great God, our King!"
'God is America's King'. I am honored to be a servant of His cabinet.
'God is the giver of freedom'. Perseving it is our job.
'God bless America!' Oh King, please protect us all while we serve your country for your glory!
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